Westbound

We laid low in San Francisco for a few days, gearing up for our big move west. The weather was so sunny and warm and beautiful, and we enjoyed the last bit of San Francisco (and some killer bluegrass) with our friends. We said goodbye to Mike and Doug, who were brave enough to make the move across country, and who we may not see for a long time. It's good to have friends in different places, but it made me a little melancholic to think of the distance between those boys and their homes, their families, their pets... Will I ever be brave enough for that one way ticket?

At the airport, further worries ensued, at least for me. I thought about all the things I'm going to miss while being so far away-- birthdays, Christmas, a new year with my closest friends, watching movies with my little sister, with Birdie at the foot of my bed, laughing with my mom.. And all in exchange for this unknowable chunk of time we've cut out of our future, to pass through strange new lands and weave in and out of so many strangers' lives. I find it all a little overwhelming.

The prospect of doing it all with J is also daunting, sometimes. Sleeping together, eating together, riding the same buses and trains and getting lost together. Sharing maps, beers, friends, expenses, good fortunes, disasters, the constant compromise. He can be such a pill! So bossy and snarky and quick to bite. Sometimes I just wanna walk away in the opposite direction, and then I remember that J is all I've got out here, the only familiar thing for thousands of miles. I'm no peach either- he'll be the first to tell you. It's a real lesson in patience and tolerance, for both of us.

J and I have been dating for about four and a half years, and we've traveled to all sorts of places together-- Australia, Spain, Morocco, the USVI... We're a good team, for the most part, and at this point I'd trust this guy with my life (he's gotten a lot better about losing things) but still. It's not easy..

2:00PM
Singapore